Dear MWHC family,
I hope these first weeks of January are life-giving, in the midst of inevitable challenges.
I already find that as I live into my Word, “Heal,” I am also living into its opposite – “Wound.” Still, it makes sense- how can we ever know the fullness of the light without acknowledging and addressing the shadow? How can we grow in our capacity to hold the glory if we haven’t been emptied in despair? Living into a word for the year means experiencing both the word and its opposite, and learning how to hold the tensions between the extremes in a centered and grounded way. So, don’t be discouraged if you have a word and for the first 9 (or 11.99) months you are assaulted by its opposite. That’s part of the growth. That’s why even just one word can be transformative. That’s why we often don’t want to settle on just one word – because it really is that hard.
But we don’t have to do it alone.
I send this out as a reminder: 1) I am here for you, and 2) I’m here in all my imperfection.
1. I am here for you.
This practice was created on a deep desire to offer health and wholeness founded on love. But love always invites, it doesn’t force. Love is always partnership, it’s not authoritative. Many people participate in this practice because of the recognition that I’m willing to have conversation and I’m willing to listen. You see yourself as a knowledgeable, experienced individual who knows what you need and wants personalized care that respects your opinions and self-understanding.
You want to get to the root cause, and I’m willing to go deep with you. And the depth doesn’t end at the biochemical imbalances – it doesn’t end at the right diet and exercise plan, and mix of pharmaceutical and nutraceutical offerings, and specialized testing.
It goes to the deep darkness of emotional and spiritual wounds that cut deep and still fester- wounds that the world acknowledges as traumatic, as well as the small cuts that have collected over a lifetime like paper cuts all over you.
And my tendency is always to go deep. Not that I’m a psychologist or psychiatrist or a counselor. But I know full well how suppressed hurt, avoidant tendencies, and disconnection of mind-body-spirit lead to unforgiveness, anger, and protective walls that lead to destructive choices, distant relationships, and a survival mode of living.
And I also know the freedom that’s possible when even one seemingly small wound is allowed to heal completely.
2. I’m here in all my imperfection.
Just like you, I’m navigating my understanding of what’s happening in this world and trying to find a balance between how to offer medical care in a world where physical touch is scary, and when the implications of spending longer than 15 minutes with a person in a small room could have potentially significant repercussions on myself, my staff, and my family.
Part of why I am writing to you more, with all these words, is the hope that when I write from this heart-felt space in me, that it offers you comfort and consolation. Even if you don’t always see me in person, you know I am here.
And integral to our relationship is my hope and belief that in keeping this practice small and allowing for multiple modes of communication, that you feel free to ask for what you need.
And that you will continue to ask for what you need until you receive it.
Just like you, when I’m “in the flow” and healthy emotionally, physically, and spiritually, my capacity to be fully present and engage with you (and sometimes even anticipate your needs) is abundant.
And, as an Enneagram 9, when I’m stressed, I disconnect and am more emotionally distant. (That’s part of my healing work).
So if you reach out initially with modes like texting or Spruce messaging or emailing and you’re not getting your questions fully answered – simply have Randi set us up for a time to talk with a phone call or by Zoom. Or if you truly feel that you need an in-person appointment for an acute medical issue, then ask for it.
And if you notice that it’s time for a refill and you wonder if it’s time to have labs and a med check or an annual physical, ask.
So yes, I’m here to be a conventional physician, and an integrative provider, and finally a witness to your journey- all of it.
If you need me, I am here. I’m here in all my imperfection.
Ask for what you need. I will always do my best for you.
Peace, health, and wholeness,