01/31/2019: Shadow

Mark 4:22 “For there is nothing hidden except to be made visible; nothing is secret except to come to light.”

The past months have been an exploration into my shadow self- an unveiling of parts of me I knew, but didn’t fully acknowledge or sit with or embrace. Parts of me that are powerful in their potential to both create and destroy. And yet, it is through my exploration of my shadow self that I learned about immense possibilities, the immense capacity I have to both give and receive Love.

Self-gift at levels I never realized existed, never knew I’d want to offer, never knew I could feel safe enough to consider the possibility of…

So what do I do when I not only have an intellectual knowledge of Love beyond love, but a lived experience of it?

How do I integrate the new inner self of me- mind/spirit- and express that with my physical self in this world?

How do I take the experiences that formed the new me… and take care that they don’t deform me?

At what point does shadow work become destruction rather than revelation?

At what point does living into a question become a time to offer an answer?

I must be at that point if I’m asking these questions. I must be at a point where I must pause, return to solitude, release fear, and reflect upon where I’m going and why.

And I must remember that I don’t live in an either/or world. I live in a both/and world in which I am fully confident that what I can’t begin to fathom is absolutely possible through my mysterious, merciful, grace-filled God.

Psalm 9:11 “Those who honor your name trust in you; you never forsake those who seek you, LORD.”